Hello Everyone! Okay, a show of hands, who has missed me?? Ohhh, you can do better than that! I've missed being here but life has been really hectic as of late. Life is always changing, we never stay the same even though we might not feel the change. I have a new position at my job; I've moved from workers' compensation rep to precert rep. There has been a lot of working over, going in to work early, & short lunches but it's all been worth it. I love the office I work at and I have amazing people that I work for and with. The past couple of weeks we have pulled together as a team united in one purpose and it has been awesome!
I've been able to visit with my daughter a couple of times and see the two youngest of her children. How I love them! And, as an unexpected treat, I'm going to visit with my oldest granddaughter shortly. There's no love like the love of family. Through happiness, sorry, joy, sadness the bond is always there. My kids & grands are scattered about but when we see each other, it's like there's been no time apart.
Yes, indeed, family is wonderful but on the flip side, when the visits are over and I have to face coming back to my home all alone, it hurts. Yes (sorry) I'm in that kind of mood this evening; feeling lonely and empty. How I long for a companion, someone to share my life with. "It's not good that man should be alone." So why am I?
I'm not asking for Prince Charming with his perfect white teeth....heaven knows I'm not Cinderella, but a good man who is honest, loving, faithful and makes me laugh, feel secure and accepts me for who I am.
Love is not always about fairy tales...real relationships have real issues to deal with. At the age of 40 and up, we all carry with us a certain amount of baggage or maybe even a little travel bag, but we have it....at our age how could we not? None of us are perfect and we shouldn't expect perfection from others. There is the issue of blending families, learning to live with another person and knowing how to compromise. If there are children involved we have to make sure they are included in the decision to bring two separate families together to make one.
This is all for now....will write more later. <heart>
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Saturday, July 16, 2011
A RAINY SATURDAY
Hello world......happy Saturday! It's a glorious rainy, stormy day here. It's been a quiet and peaceful day; how I love the rain, the thunder. I feel very close to nature during a thunderstorm.
There are a lot of things I could write about today, some of which would probably be not so nice. Have you ever felt that you had a sign on your back that says "I'm a fool looking for love...please come and hurt me." or one of my personal favorites..."I want an eternal companion so much that I'll believe your lies." Am I wrong to want a loving husband? Is that so much to ask?? Once again, I have been taught a lesson about working on my spiritual self and being patient as I prepare for a companion. I believe the promise that if I will continue to be faithful I will be blessed with someone. Why can't I be patient?
I'd like to offer a little advice to the men out in the world. Please don't put yourself on a singles dating site such as Match.com, Eharmony, or Christian Mingle in you're not...well single. It's dishonest, disrespectful and hurtful to many people; don't lie because the truth always comes out eventually. So....I'm a little older and maybe a little wiser yet again. I've decided to stop worrying about my relationship status and focus on me...doing what I need to do to make me the person I should be and was meant to be. Keeping the faith and not falling for deceptive people who are miserable and want to drag me down with them.
Sometimes I feel that I am not good enough, but we are all created in the image of a loving Heavenly Father; we're His children...how could we NOT be good enough?? It's so easy to play the pity card but if we stop for a moment and reflect on what we have instead of what we don't have it's pretty eye opening. I'm blessed beyond measure to have my loving family, caring friends who are always there for me, the sweetest, smartest and most beautiful cats in the world, but the most important blessing of all is a knowledge of who I am, where I came from, why I am here and depending on my actions, where I will go.
Life is what we make it. Take each new day as a fresh start; be kind to other people, lighten their load; each one of us has a problem, an issue, a pain...that makes us all having something in common. If you want to feel really good inside...do something for someone else but don't advertise the fact that you did. A smile, an ear to listen, even a gentle touch can mean the world to someone. My landlord is one of the kindest people I know. One of his favorite sayings is "my day isn't complete until I've helped someone." Can you imagine how much better the world would be if everyone did just one good thing for someone else?
On a different note, my son Ryan was awarded custody of his 4yr old son Hudson. Ryan has been down a long, frustrating, hurtful road. The months overseas not being able to talk to Hudson, the legal battles all finally came to a resolution a couple of weeks ago. See how our actions have consequences? My son, like me and the rest of the human race, is not perfect, but he is a wonderful, loving father. I'm thankful that he is the man he is today because the role model he had growing up was not a very good one.
I deeply love Ryan, my son Timmy, and my daughter Laura...I pray that they know that. My love also is for Hannah, Bryson, Kennedy, Hudson, Rylan, and the little sprout that's on the way. Family is everything...."Families are Forever"
There are a lot of things I could write about today, some of which would probably be not so nice. Have you ever felt that you had a sign on your back that says "I'm a fool looking for love...please come and hurt me." or one of my personal favorites..."I want an eternal companion so much that I'll believe your lies." Am I wrong to want a loving husband? Is that so much to ask?? Once again, I have been taught a lesson about working on my spiritual self and being patient as I prepare for a companion. I believe the promise that if I will continue to be faithful I will be blessed with someone. Why can't I be patient?
I'd like to offer a little advice to the men out in the world. Please don't put yourself on a singles dating site such as Match.com, Eharmony, or Christian Mingle in you're not...well single. It's dishonest, disrespectful and hurtful to many people; don't lie because the truth always comes out eventually. So....I'm a little older and maybe a little wiser yet again. I've decided to stop worrying about my relationship status and focus on me...doing what I need to do to make me the person I should be and was meant to be. Keeping the faith and not falling for deceptive people who are miserable and want to drag me down with them.
Sometimes I feel that I am not good enough, but we are all created in the image of a loving Heavenly Father; we're His children...how could we NOT be good enough?? It's so easy to play the pity card but if we stop for a moment and reflect on what we have instead of what we don't have it's pretty eye opening. I'm blessed beyond measure to have my loving family, caring friends who are always there for me, the sweetest, smartest and most beautiful cats in the world, but the most important blessing of all is a knowledge of who I am, where I came from, why I am here and depending on my actions, where I will go.
Life is what we make it. Take each new day as a fresh start; be kind to other people, lighten their load; each one of us has a problem, an issue, a pain...that makes us all having something in common. If you want to feel really good inside...do something for someone else but don't advertise the fact that you did. A smile, an ear to listen, even a gentle touch can mean the world to someone. My landlord is one of the kindest people I know. One of his favorite sayings is "my day isn't complete until I've helped someone." Can you imagine how much better the world would be if everyone did just one good thing for someone else?
On a different note, my son Ryan was awarded custody of his 4yr old son Hudson. Ryan has been down a long, frustrating, hurtful road. The months overseas not being able to talk to Hudson, the legal battles all finally came to a resolution a couple of weeks ago. See how our actions have consequences? My son, like me and the rest of the human race, is not perfect, but he is a wonderful, loving father. I'm thankful that he is the man he is today because the role model he had growing up was not a very good one.
I deeply love Ryan, my son Timmy, and my daughter Laura...I pray that they know that. My love also is for Hannah, Bryson, Kennedy, Hudson, Rylan, and the little sprout that's on the way. Family is everything...."Families are Forever"
Saturday, July 2, 2011
2 JULY 2011
Happy Independence Weekend to everyone! Be safe...the life you save just might be your own!
On this day, 30 yrs ago, I had a beautiful baby boy! His name is Matthew Ryan Lassiter and I consider being his Mother one of the 3 best things that has ever happened to me! He arrived at 4:10 a.m. an adorable, perfect little boy with ten fingers, ten toes and not much hair. Thirty years later he's still adorable and still doesn't have much hair. Sorry Ryan! I'm proud of my son and the accomplishments he's made in his life. He has served this country in the Alabama Air National Guard and been deployed overseas several times. He now serves the city he lives in as a member of law enforcement. I'm proud of the man he has become, the husband that he is, and the father he is. He and his wife Erica have two precious children, Hudson and Rylan who will be joined by a new brother or sister in a few months.
So Happy Birthday Ryan! I wish you happiness, joy, love and all good things in your life. I am blessed beyond measure to have you as a son.
Love you!
Mom
On this day, 30 yrs ago, I had a beautiful baby boy! His name is Matthew Ryan Lassiter and I consider being his Mother one of the 3 best things that has ever happened to me! He arrived at 4:10 a.m. an adorable, perfect little boy with ten fingers, ten toes and not much hair. Thirty years later he's still adorable and still doesn't have much hair. Sorry Ryan! I'm proud of my son and the accomplishments he's made in his life. He has served this country in the Alabama Air National Guard and been deployed overseas several times. He now serves the city he lives in as a member of law enforcement. I'm proud of the man he has become, the husband that he is, and the father he is. He and his wife Erica have two precious children, Hudson and Rylan who will be joined by a new brother or sister in a few months.
So Happy Birthday Ryan! I wish you happiness, joy, love and all good things in your life. I am blessed beyond measure to have you as a son.
Love you!
Mom
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Sunday June 12
Happy Sunday night! I'm in a quiet (enjoy it while you can) reflective mood tonight. I've been neglecting my blog among other things lately. We rarely ignore our body's request for food, but how often do we ignore our spirit? It needs nourishment as much as the body. I've neglected my spirit but a couple of weeks ago it made it's presence and need for attention known. One of my Mother's favorite names to call me was "hardheaded." I know what I'm supposed to do...how many times do I have to be told? I'm once again trying to work on my spiritual self. I know for a fact that we have a Father in Heaven who loves us very much and I'm thankful for all the blessings He gives me everyday and for always giving me a chance to "get things right."
.
.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
BARBARA....A REBIRTH OF SORTS
Hello Dearest Blog,
My apologies for leaving you all alone for so long. You, however, are like me and you're resilient and you bounce back. After all it's the only choice we have; perhaps not the only choice, but the smart one.
Let's see if I can bring you up to date. Last month I saw a new doctor for my diabetes, a new endocrinologist who I adore and thank for his knowledge and expertise. I've been taking insulin for a few weeks now and for the first time in such a long time, I feel great! My energy has returned, I'm eating healthy and I look forward to every day now.
I'm grateful for my renewed body and spirit because I have a new grandson...Rylan Tate Lassiter made his appearance on February 16, 2011, a couple of weeks after Ryan returned from Kyrgyzstan. Gosh, I have beautiful grandchildren! Rylan is a sweet angel just sent from heaven. A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to spend time with him and also Hudson whom I haven't seen in so very long. The love in your heart for family and the bond you share never goes away...no matter how hard evil people try to take it away.
I know Ryan was deeply grateful to have his family together again.
I can't say that my life is all joy and happiness. I worry so much about another of my children. I feel helpless because I want to help this person so much and there's nothing I can do. But (my child) I love you so deeply...I don't want to see you have the problems in your life I had when you were growing up. Only you can make the changes necessary for your life to improve, but never forget I'm here in your corner, I'm always here for you...I'm your biggest fan.
Well, dearest Blog, I think I've brought you up to date on all that's going on with me these days. Who knows how much time we have here on this earth. I lost a dear friend I grew up with a few weeks ago...she was 2 years younger than me. We went to church together when we were kids through our teenage years. If every woman could be half the woman Deborah was we would be amazing. She was beautiful, talented, a true Latter Day Saint woman who loved the Lord, her husband, her children and grandchildren. She never had an unkind word to say about anyone. I miss you Deborah.
There is a beautiful "super" moon tonight. I enjoyed sitting outside in the quiet and getting lost in it's beauty. Our lives move in such a fast pace it's easy to forget about the small things...a fresh spring morning, the scent of a rose, the simple beauty of a moonlit night. Stop, take time to enjoy life.
My apologies for leaving you all alone for so long. You, however, are like me and you're resilient and you bounce back. After all it's the only choice we have; perhaps not the only choice, but the smart one.
Let's see if I can bring you up to date. Last month I saw a new doctor for my diabetes, a new endocrinologist who I adore and thank for his knowledge and expertise. I've been taking insulin for a few weeks now and for the first time in such a long time, I feel great! My energy has returned, I'm eating healthy and I look forward to every day now.
I'm grateful for my renewed body and spirit because I have a new grandson...Rylan Tate Lassiter made his appearance on February 16, 2011, a couple of weeks after Ryan returned from Kyrgyzstan. Gosh, I have beautiful grandchildren! Rylan is a sweet angel just sent from heaven. A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to spend time with him and also Hudson whom I haven't seen in so very long. The love in your heart for family and the bond you share never goes away...no matter how hard evil people try to take it away.
I know Ryan was deeply grateful to have his family together again.
I can't say that my life is all joy and happiness. I worry so much about another of my children. I feel helpless because I want to help this person so much and there's nothing I can do. But (my child) I love you so deeply...I don't want to see you have the problems in your life I had when you were growing up. Only you can make the changes necessary for your life to improve, but never forget I'm here in your corner, I'm always here for you...I'm your biggest fan.
Well, dearest Blog, I think I've brought you up to date on all that's going on with me these days. Who knows how much time we have here on this earth. I lost a dear friend I grew up with a few weeks ago...she was 2 years younger than me. We went to church together when we were kids through our teenage years. If every woman could be half the woman Deborah was we would be amazing. She was beautiful, talented, a true Latter Day Saint woman who loved the Lord, her husband, her children and grandchildren. She never had an unkind word to say about anyone. I miss you Deborah.
There is a beautiful "super" moon tonight. I enjoyed sitting outside in the quiet and getting lost in it's beauty. Our lives move in such a fast pace it's easy to forget about the small things...a fresh spring morning, the scent of a rose, the simple beauty of a moonlit night. Stop, take time to enjoy life.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Missing...
I wonder...
I wonder if anyone besides me is missing Christmas....no, not the stress, the rushing around madness or the hustle and bustle. I'm thinking of the exact opposite. The peace and love of the season. Christmas isn't just a day or a holiday...it's a feeling, a time when most people are nicer and more thoughtful of their fellow man. It's a feeling of being wrapped in an embrace of invisible, caring, loving arms.
As the song would say..."it's the most wonderful time of the year."
All too soon the Christmas spirit has faded away...it's as if the moment the tree comes down, all the sweet emotions go with it. Please Christmas....please stay a little longer.
Christmas this year was nice...but it won't be complete until Ryan comes home. He was surely missed by everyone..especially his Mom. So, we'll get to have Christmas all over again when he's home.
Gigi and I went to a baby shower yesterday for Erica. It was such a nice time to visit with her and her family. They are very dear people and we feel blessed to have them in our lives. The shower was very entertaining...I took lots of pictures of Ryan when he was growing up for Erica to see....sort of "Ryan through the years" I know she enjoyed the one taken at Six Flags...Ryan wearing his Donald Duck cap, sunglasses, guns & holster. Please don't be embarrassed Ryan; these pictures represent precious moments.
In case you can't tell, I love my son very much and I'm thankful he has such a sweet, loving, and caring wife. She's a remarkably mature and strong young lady.
I can say that tonight...life is good. I'm blessed with the best family in the world and I pray that each one of them knows how deeply they are loved.
I wonder if anyone besides me is missing Christmas....no, not the stress, the rushing around madness or the hustle and bustle. I'm thinking of the exact opposite. The peace and love of the season. Christmas isn't just a day or a holiday...it's a feeling, a time when most people are nicer and more thoughtful of their fellow man. It's a feeling of being wrapped in an embrace of invisible, caring, loving arms.
As the song would say..."it's the most wonderful time of the year."
All too soon the Christmas spirit has faded away...it's as if the moment the tree comes down, all the sweet emotions go with it. Please Christmas....please stay a little longer.
Christmas this year was nice...but it won't be complete until Ryan comes home. He was surely missed by everyone..especially his Mom. So, we'll get to have Christmas all over again when he's home.
Gigi and I went to a baby shower yesterday for Erica. It was such a nice time to visit with her and her family. They are very dear people and we feel blessed to have them in our lives. The shower was very entertaining...I took lots of pictures of Ryan when he was growing up for Erica to see....sort of "Ryan through the years" I know she enjoyed the one taken at Six Flags...Ryan wearing his Donald Duck cap, sunglasses, guns & holster. Please don't be embarrassed Ryan; these pictures represent precious moments.
In case you can't tell, I love my son very much and I'm thankful he has such a sweet, loving, and caring wife. She's a remarkably mature and strong young lady.
I can say that tonight...life is good. I'm blessed with the best family in the world and I pray that each one of them knows how deeply they are loved.
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